Nappy changing

I'VE come to the conclusion Jacob hates having his nappy changed and probably would be happy lying in his own mess!

The kid is that laid back that trying to do the decent thing and cleaning him up causes much crying, whimpering and general moaning.

I thought this was normal, well that and the fact he loves weeing over whoever is unlucky enough to have the task of cleaning up.

Maybe all babies hate being naked until they hit toddler hood and then like to roam free as nature intended? I shouldn't fear, all will be well and hey, I can make him laugh after he's been changed!!

Then we visited my cousin at the weekend, who became a dad for the second time in May. His little boy needed changing, so I thought oh boy prepare for the fireworks.

Instead he lay there, had a good nose around and was stripped completely naked (it was one of those nappy changes!) and was perfectly happy, not a tear or a whimper or anything.

HOW DARE THIS CHILD BE MORE CHILLED OUT AND PERFECT THAN MY OWN!!

I guess that's another part of the journey we can share, I am kind of looking forward to the exhibitionist naked phase to see if I am a prude or just sitting there laughing!

I would like to calm him down when changing him though, nothing works so far but its a work in progress!

Babies are strange aren't they!

Sleep!

REMEMBER it? That thing you used to do of a night....no not that you dirty little so and soes.

Despite parenthood changing our whole lives, the biggest change for me personally has been sleep. Luckily we have a child whose very keen on sleeping when it's dark so that is challenge one out of the way.

However, we have both gone from seven hours continuous sleep to seven hours in installments which isn't too bad. Making my lunch at 6am while waiting for a bottle to warm does shave time off my morning routine!

I am starting to think though all the tips to get them to sleep are rubbish and your baby will do what the heck he or she likes. The only input you have is if you listen to what they want then they MAY oblige and give you some much needed rest.

In the last 10 days Jacob has increased his feeds of an evening, up until 4pm he quite happy to go three/four hours between his milk. After 4.30pm though, he becomes 'The Milk Monster' and makes it quite clear he wants milk at 7pm.

I like to think he is pleased to see me and wants to reward me for a hard day's work with some daddy time but it's probably just because he's starving!

That takes us to about 9ish when he is then after it again and up until the last two nights he guzzles away happily and then falls asleep. However the last two nights he's been so knackered from all the playtime with mummy feeding is hard work.

It's a routine of sorts because after 9pm feed he is very happy until at least 3am/3.30am which gives us some much needed snooze time!

But it's not the same for everyone and I am not showing off at all, just think its the luck of the draw!

Five things I'd like to tell myself when I was a dad to be

REFLECTING this weekend on how much life has changed since Jacob came tumbling into the world I thought to myself how great would it be to go back to your dad to be self for one day?

You could give yourself advice and tips on handling your little bundle of joy before he/she arrived and become a super dad in the process!

Oh how good would you look if you had the answers before the problem even occurred. As Pam was having a sleep and Jacob decided to have a snooze in my arms I thought I'd come up with five things I'd go back and tell myself.

1) Getting wee'd and poo'd on is normal - Before having a baby, the idea of being wee'd and poo'ed on is reserved for the more kinkier minded. Now it's normal, especially if you have a little boy. There's even the strange moment you enjoy it...no not because of what you are thinking you dirty minded lot....but you are happy your little pride and joy is not constipated!

2) The strangest things can settle your baby - Once winded, cleaned and fed they just cry for whatever reason. Your brain will start throwing suggestions and your little baby will suddenly respond. One such night involved me walking up and down the living room in the pitch black making endless shhhhhhhh noises.....

3) Babies trump and yes it's hillarious - winding a baby is amusing especially when they belch very VERY loudly but nothing beats a good old trump. What is even more amusing is when they do it so loud it actually wakes them up from a slumber. Juvenile humour yes but goodness they are a comedy goldmine at times.

4) You are going to feel like the ultimate stud - Dad's not going to lie to you the idea of going out on your own to give your beloved a lie in is daunting for two reasons a) Being seen with a pushchair could be seen as a bit feminine or b) They could start doing something only mummy knows how to cope with and your miles away from home! However after the first trip out a strange thing will happen, you will suddenly walk like you are totally on top of the situation and with a swagger that says 'Yes my tackle works and helped make this, I am male HEAR ME ROAR!!!!!!.....or was that just me?

5) Conversations with the wife - be warned, when you talked about serious matters of state or your day, you may find yourselves talking about how many poos your little one has done.....

Oh and one thing which is non negotiable and is therefore not a sixth point....FOR GOD'S SAKE DON'T PANIC!! THERE IS AN ANSWER YOU JUST HAVE TO WORK IT OUT!!!

The Great Nappy Debate

'GET Aldi' they cried, 'works for us, we tried them all and Aldi didn't leak or anything' – that was the advice before we had Jacob.

Being a bit old fashioned though we wanted to start with an established brand name and since Huggies left the building for the most part, it was Pampers for us.

And now, three weeks in I can honestly say we are happy with the results. Jacob has never been wet when changed or stained his clothes as a result of a leaky nappy.

I accept it may be down to correct fitting by mummy (certainly not daddy!) but given the force he can do his business I think a lot of credit has to go to Pampers.

We are already on size 2 of the Pampers New Baby because Jacob was so heavy and what I like is the numbered system showing you when you perhaps need the next size up.

Yes before anyone says it I am that simple!

I also like the line on the front of the nappy which changes from yellow to blue in the event of a wee related change of nappy.

Many other products do it as well but we are very comfortable with Pampers, some of the changes we have done have been very heavy and wet nappies yet Jacob's skin is remarkably dry.

I've realised in the early weeks of fatherhood that baby's mean big business and there is so much competition for your hard-earned cash.

If something works but costs a bit more then surely it's better to stick to it? I accept Pampers may not work 

for some parents but for us, first time parents, they've been great.

How has everyone else found nappies? Did anyone go through different brands before settling on the ones for them?

Going back to work....:-(

I WOULD like to complain, no antenatal class teaches you how to cope when the day comes for you to return to work....

Monday was easily the hardest thing I have ever done, after two weeks of feeding, changing, going on walks and generally being a hands-on daddy, the need to earn money prised me away.

I did do my best toddler impression and tried to throw a tantrum (in my mind, the wife doesn't need two babies!) but the time had come.

I could have course not gone but pretty soon we'd have had no house and I don't think it's fair to put a newborn in a cardboard box.

Pam was amazing and did his night feeds so I could get some sleep ahead of going back to work but when the alarm went it was still full of dread.

I just about got dressed and made my lunch before it was time to say goodbye. Held my emotions at the bedroom door and then said goodbye to Pam and to Jacob who I swear deliberately looked even more 

adorable just to add to the moment.

But despite nearly being in tears on the way to work, they both had a wonderful day and have had a great week, me going back has given Pam a surge of confidence and I could not be prouder of her.

As a result I feel better, yes I miss them like crazy when I am at work and wondering what they are doing.

However, Jacob needs his mummy and needs his daddy to love him and care for him but also protect him and the best way I can do that is keep a roof over his head.

Should dads have longer at home? I think so yes but to be honest the levels of paternity pay from the Government are pitiful.

I lost £200 from my salary and that was only with one week's paternity leave and the other as annual leave.

But there is no better feeling than driving home from a day at work knowing you will see your loving partner 

and baby.

I adore walking in and taking over to give Pam a break, hillariously last night I walked in just before a feed so changed his nappy, started to feed and what did Jacob do? Fill his nappy.

Talk about a welcome home......parenthood eh?

In praise of the NHS - part two

I'VE put part two as I am pretty sure I have wrote good things about the NHS on this blog before....

Part of the wonderful experience of being new parents was the care we had from the midwives and surgeons at Worcestershire Royal Hospital.

From Pam Jones and her team the weekend before Jacob was born, to Ellie, Ali and Katie after his arrival, Pam was in safe hands throughout her time in hospital.

Midwives are the unsung heroes of the NHS, we were so well looked after from actual care to them just sitting and talking for a moment or two answering our newbie questions!

Ellie was wonderful on the delivery date itself, looked after Pam all the way into theatre and kept nice and calm when Jacob was born and needed just a little help to get started.

Even when she was called away to care for another lady in labour, she found the time to come back at the end of her shift and apologise - even though she was sharing her talents and helping another woman bring new life into the world.

The post natal staff were just as wonderful, they could not have done more to help Pam breastfeed but sadly Jacob was too laid back to latch on. A problem he still has now when he has his bottle!

But the care was exceptional, support and advice was forever on hand despite the ward being busier than Kings Cross at rush hour on numerous occasions.

It makes you appreciate what we have for free in this country, the NHS is an institution which needs to be modernised and nursed back to health.

To all midwives, I salute you. To all those who helped us from August 13 to August 16 I thank you on behalf of Pam and of the not so little Jacob!

Our First Days as a Mummy and Daddy

WE SURVIVED!! Well we have for the first two weeks anyway. Mission one of parenting, don’t kill it has been achieved!

It’s been an eye-opening two weeks, funny because a lot of the time Jacob kept his eyes closed!!!!

And everybody who said it would turn my world upside down was absolutely correct, life as we know it changed massively on August 14.

The biggest lesson I have learned though is to watch my son, his cues nearly always give a guide as to what he wants at that moment.

Oh and to not panic, those early days when they cry for no apparent reason can sometimes solved with more feeds, especially if they are trying to regain their birth weight as Jacob has been.

The Sunday night after we came home saw both of us have meltdowns, it’s only the next day we looked at things and realised he was just after another feed!

Hindsight is very important for new parents!

I’ve learned a lot about myself, especially if I relax and let my instinct take over I am actually quite good at taking care of him.

I have also learned that there is another level above love, I love Pam and would do anything for her but Jacob….just looking at him sleep can make me feel WOW

To any dads to be, some advice:

-          ALWAYS sleep when they sleep when you get home, you will need it and it’s amazing how the extra power gained with a lunchtime nap sustains you during the 3am feed.

-          Tackle nappies as soon as you can, they don’t smell during the first few days so it’s a good chance to hone the changing skill before the smelly ones arrive.

-          Being weed on is a badge of honour, you can learn to try and block it but the clever so and so’s work around it…

-          Try and do as much as you can for your beloved, it will be appreciated.

-          If you need to go out in first few days after you come home, walk to the shop if you can. Fresh air is wonderful and you might feel a little spaced out.

-          Be prepared your normally sharp brain may be a little fuzzy,  for example you might go to the bank to pay a cheque in and forget to take your wallet……

But most importantly, enjoy it! It’s a wonderful voyage of discovery and one I am so glad I brought a ticket for!